Courting

[Leothelioness]

Even though I am currently still single, this is a topic I have thought a lot about.

Several years ago I would have been against the whole courtship thing, but after going on a blind date with someone I was set up with that I had never met, it made me realise just how much I want to really know that person before I court them.

I've definitely warmed up to the friends first thing after that experience.

What about y'all?

[Ethnog]

I feel like courting is a Christian word for dating but with courting you don't date around but date someone who see yourself getting married too? Is that what it means?

I feel uncomfortable being set up. It's happened twice and I hated it beyond words. I like it my time.

[Leothelioness]

Me, too, Ethie. I hate being set up and I've told people that, but my boss is always trying to set me up with people. I even have clients trying to set me up with their sons.

[Ethnog]

I got asked on Friday and I said NO!!! They said why and I told them because people set me up with morons. Lol

[mina]

I feel like within Christian circles; courting is often made to be something that is often ridiculous and some people get too carried away with "courting" and thinks it makes them super spiritual or "super Christian" . I really just think it's the same thing as dating in some respect. However, I do think there are principals that are smart to pay attention to , no matter if you choose to call it courting or dating. I think it's important to know and respect the person before dating them. And I think that if you and the other person both have good relationships with your parents and family ; then it's smart to get their opinion of the person from family that you trust and any red flags they may see that you do not, BEFORE you commit to them. And you have to be open to hearing that.
I do think that God can work in a way that is outside that though. I know married friends that met on blind dates, just on their own, and one couple that met just by chance in a bar!

[Wesley]

I agree with Ethnog that courting is often a Christian word for dating, but makes some super-conservative people feel more comfortable. The definition of dating vs courting is mere semantics. The people who define courting as different from dating are just pulling a definition out of their hat. Dating and courting are syntactically the same, but culture has chosen to prefer the word "dating" in modern times to describe what is in essence the same thing.

So I get that serial dating and being emotionally sleezy, even if your not physically sleeping around, is hard and strings people along. I think people should see eachother as people who deserve respect and kindness, and not play games or be close one minute and distant the next. I think two people should state intentions fairly plainly and fairly early on and just be open and honest with eachother. That looks a lot like what some people have defined as courtship, but it's really not one thing or another. It's just being respectful.

So courtship? Dating? Just... be good to people. Good as in Christlike. It'll all work out good if you do.

Then there's people like Jonathan Lindvall who at one time advocated courtship, but then said that was just Christian dating and now advocates betrothal. What the actual heck, people.

[MacFall]

Hi Leo!

I don't see much of a difference between dating and courting, really, except that courting seems to have more rules. Personally I've never been much of a fan of dating; I've always been a "friends first" kind of guy. I realize that probably means I'll remain single. I'm okay with that.

[Leothelioness]

MacFall!! How you doin', buddy?

Yeah, as I said I've really warmed up to the friends first thing. After that fiasco I will never go out with someone I don't know ever again.

And that means I'll probably remain single, too.